Tired

I'm just so done with everything,
I'm tired of smiling even though I'm not OK. 
I'm tired of fake friends.
I'm tired of trusting people I don't know well enough.
I'm tired of making mistakes.
I'm tired of feeling alone.
I'm tired of trying. 
I'm tired of waking up every morning lying to myself thinking that I'm fine when I'm not. 
I just need a hug from a real friend.I just need someone next to me, someone that will tell me to keep trying, to try even harder. Someone that will make me smile. Someone that I know I can trust. Someone that won't judge me. Someone I could laugh with. 
Why is everything this hard?